Dear Sarah, oh naive Sarah. I know you like to stir up controversy by running around talking about how everyone else is stirring up controversy. After all, Seth MacFarlane should be ashamed of himself for mocking you, a public figure. However, you have forgotten something, unfortunately. You see, for there to be a controversy, someone has to care. Honestly, I, and most of America, does not care, either.

You run around feigning insult from anyone who conflicts with your personal narrative of how the world works. The truth is, Seth MacFarlane wasn’t insulting your “child” or “grandchild”, depending on which narrative we believe. (Aside: It doesn’t help that Levi Johnston wouldn’t actually show us his “johnston” in Playgirl, lending credence that he probably couldn’t have knocked up your daughter, not that I discount that he is the father.)

As someone who claims to be so in tune with America, I know that you know that the “American Language”, because lets not insult the language by continuing to call the bastardization “English”, is a constantly changing dialect based on the people in the country, and the intellect that those people possess. When a 17 year old says something is gay, it isn’t a disparaging insult to a homosexual, but a bastardization that is probably followed by the phrase, “epic fail”. When anyone uses the term “retarded”, it isn’t a disparaging remark about someone with a true disability, but a remark about society.

When someone says retarded in your direction, regardless of who it is, it isn’t targeted towards Trig, who is suffering from a terrible disorder that perhaps can be cured at some point in the future. Indeed, due your lack of comprehension of reality, your insistent need to distort the truth to meet your own narrative, and your feigning insult at every faux controversy you create while you seem to be a completely capable and high functioning member of society, this is what makes you the retard.